


Serendipity

by Psyren



Series: Nothing Like Us [2]
Category: Free! Iwatobi Swim Club - Fandom, Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Crossover, Crossover Pairings, Drowning, Friends to Lovers, Lovers to Friends, M/M, Near Death Experiences, Overcoming Trauma, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Rarepair, Teaching Kei to Swim, haikyuu au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-17
Updated: 2020-06-28
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:33:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24232867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Psyren/pseuds/Psyren
Summary: Kei had always thought his first real love would be for and with Tetsurou. But Sydney had other plans. And his name was Rin Matsuoka.He'd been like that Little Mermaid, saving Kei, the drowning Prince.Rin was forever unexpected, and Kei found himself drunk on that about him. Real life fairy tales are terrifying, but what else was there to do, but fall in love?
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Kuroo Tetsurou/Tsukishima Kei, Matsuoka Rin/Tsukishima Kei, Yachi Hitoka/Yamaguchi Tadashi
Series: Nothing Like Us [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1746445
Comments: 26
Kudos: 29





	1. Red

**Author's Note:**

> The backstory to Rin and Kei's relationship for the other story in this series: The Boy(s) Who Murdered Love!  
> I was inspired by all my RinTsuki shippers, so my lovelies! This one's for you!
> 
> Hope you all enjoy!

The only reason Kei remembers the date he first met Rin was because it was two weeks before his 18th. Him and Akiteru were down at the beach, playing 2 on 2 beach volleyball against other beach volleyball goers. They'd been doing this for the better part of the year they'd been in Sydney, going down to the beach after Kei's classes ended. Kei had hated at first. He hated sand and it's annoying tendency to get everywhere. He hated the uncertainty of the sand, it's giving causing him to almost roll and ankle several times the first few weeks. He forever cursed his pale complexion after being exposed to the brutal summer sun. But a month in, Kei's legs and ankles strengthened enough to a point where he actually felt _good_ at volleyball again, and had developed a nice slight tan. Unfortunately though, with that slight tan came a horrific glasses tan line that Akietru teased him relentlessly about. So Kei had gotten into the habit of wearing contacts to the beach. And yet, Akiteru still teased him.

So when Kei first met Rin, it was like any other day. For the better part of the match Kei been blocking spike after spike, his one touches ever persistent, much to the annoyance of his competitors, and had even been getting better at his serves thanks to the tips Kageyama had given him over their video call chats. However, his accuracy was still only 50:50, and one particularly serve, accompanied by a wayward gust of wind, had managed to strike an unsuspecting beach goer in the back of the head. This was their first encounter.

Rin's friends broke out laughing at the surprised and indignant sound that left the redhead as he stumbled forward. He whipped around, rubbing the back of his head, glaring at the volleyball on the floor.

"Oi!"

His glare turned to Kei.   
"Sorry!" He wasn't. "Mind tossing it back this way?"

Rin, ever the king of pettiness, picked the ball back up. He wandered over, his friends chuckling and gossiping behind him. "Why? So you can assault me again?"

"Like you're worth the effort. Sides, I never miss twice."

Rin scowled as him and his boys pulled up next to the court. "You seem to think you're pretty good huh?"  
Kei raised a thin eyebrow while Akiteru barked out a laugh, looking between the two. "I am."

"Oh really now?"

"Why don't you come play and find out?" Akiteru hummed slyly, a slow lazy grin spreading as he wiggled his eyebrows.

"Wha-? Nii-san?"

"After this game of course." He said, raising his hands in a placating gesture. "Then you can decide how good he supposedly is."

Kei glared at his brother who was standing there all smiles. He sighed in annoyance, turning his gaze on Rin. "Well? You gonna play or just stand there barking all day? Mister...?"

"The name's Rin." Rin snarled back, tossing the ball back to Kei. "And you're on."

-

To make a long story short, Rin's pride alone was no match against the two seasoned volleyball players, and, as a result, Kei and Akiteru had wiped the _floor_ with Rin and his pride. 

Rin who hurriedly got up, glowering at a smirking Kei as he brushed the sand off him. "Fine, okay, whatever, you're good." He huffed as Kei turned his nose up. 

"Thanks for pointing out the obvious. Now, if you'll excuse us-"

"Wait! We competed at something you're good at, now we compete at something we're good at."

Kei stared at him like he was stupid. "... Are you stupid."

"Hah!?"  
"Why, would I ever do that? Not my fault you didn't believe I was good at this."

"Hey now c'mon Kei."  
"Nii-san don't."

Akiteru lifted the net and stood beside Rin, clapping him on the shoulder before he grinned at his younger brother. "Some healthy competition is always good."  
"Competition requires an even playing field. I'm not a fast swimmer. And since you suggested it, I'm willing to bet you are."

Rin felt it his turn to smirk, crossing his arms. "Well, you're not wrong there. Well can you at least swim half-decently?"

Kei shrugged an affirmation. 

"Alright. Long distance then. To that island." The island wasn't that far and the water was calm, which is the only reason Kei was even considering it, despite himself. And Rin could tell. "C'moooooon," He hummed.

"Yeah c'mon Kei," Akiteru parroted.

"No."  
"Don't tell me you're scared?" Rin asked with blatantly fake worry. "Ke~i-chan~"

Kei's eyebrow twitched before he glowered at Rin. "Tch. I'm not scared."

Rin's smirk spread further across his lips. "Then I'll see you in the water."

-

Kei _was_ a decent enough swimmer, but he was absolutely _no_ match for the man who had spent his life gunning for the Olympics. So Kei was only 3/4 of the way over, at best, by the time Rin had finished. The blonde drew a ragged sigh as he continued trawling his way through the ocean, frown deepened slightly as he found his arms tiring quicker than they had been. Surely he wasn't getting exhausted now? No. The water was getting rougher. _Fuck._ Kei lifted his head to breathe only to be struck by a wave in the face. His pace faltered and he floundered slightly to get his head above water, stealing a gasping breath. He glanced skywards. The sky was barely grey, yet white caps were covering the sea's surface like a plague.

Kei registered the faint beginnings of panic so he put his head down and swum harder, trying to move faster. Kei audibly swore when he felt it start to spit. More often than not now his attempts to breathe were thwarted by the water being choppier than he expected. He felt the strain in his muscles and a burning in his lungs. He painstakingly continued, stroke after stroke, swimming to that island, because now? Now Kei didn't have a choice. He _had_ to reach that island before the rain. If he didn't, well... He didn't want to think about that. 

Kei still remembers what happened next, as clear as if he was reliving it. That crack of thunder. The way it split the sky open. It was the reason Kei couldn't sleep through thunderstorms, afraid he'd open his eyes be back there, in the middle of the ocean with death beckoning him. Heavy raindrops came thundering down, the sky darkened, the ocean alive and enraged. 

Kei's fear weighed heavy in the pit of his stomach as he tried to out-maneuver the water. The waves were coming harder. Faster. Higher. He still remembers the weightlessness he felt as a particular wave picked him up and forced him under. That broke all self-control he hand. Panic flooded his senses as water attempted to flood his lungs before he broke the surface. "Nii-san! He-! Help! Nii-san!" Kei was vaguely aware of his name being yelled before he was forced under again. "Aki-!" Kei wasn't swimming anymore. Every instinct, every fibre of his body, was driving him to keep his head above water. " _Akiteru!_ " 

Thunder and lightning ripped the sky open again, rain pelting down harder. "Aki-!" Kei was violently forced under, the air knocked from his lungs. Blind. Breathless. Terrified. Kei had no way of telling which was up. Contacts and goggles long gone. He felt like he was swimming and swimming and never reaching the surface. His tears lost in the sea as his lungs burned inside his chest. _Akiteru._ The waves on the surface shifted Kei's body this way and that, further disorienting him. He screwed his eyes shut, biting his lips hard enough to break skin, arms flailing, legs kicking blindly, _desperate_ to feel the biting wind that would let him know he'd broken the surface, give him some semblance of up from down. _Akiteru!_ But it never came. Kei suddenly stopped fighting the water, opting to cover his mouth in a futile attempts to stop his reflexive gasps for air. The water was heavy, painful, as it entered his airways with each heaving gasp. _So this is what it's like... To drown..._ Kei's insides burned, his head felt heavy, and his limbs cold as he floated in the depths of the ocean. He'd given all he could, and now he could give no more. Kei opened his eyes, despite their burning in protest. He gazed around. Darkness. Nothing but darkness. He curled into himself, drifting aimlessly beyond the storm. 

_I'm going to die._

-

_Red._

It was only for a moment, but Kei remembers it, filling the nothingness around him. The distinct colour red, and the feeling of warmth.

-

A steady, rhythmic beeping, was the first thing Kei became aware of. Then the weight of his arms and legs. His fingers and toes twitched in an attempt to move the limbs, but they felt like lead. Next the pouding in his head and the dryness in his throat drew his attention, causing him to let out a soft groan as he rolled his head painfully to the side. He remembers turning his head into something soft, something warm beneath his finger tips, and a very soft, very distant voice he didn't recognise. It sounded urgent.

_"Please get someone! I think he's awake!"_

Kei frowned deeply, eyes rolling restlessly behind heavy eyelids. With significantly more mental exertion than, under normal circumstances, was necessary, Kei managed to crack an eyelid open.

_Red eyes._

Kei felt warm air rhythmically cross his skin, as he squinted, willing the image before him to come into focus. _Red eyes_. That was the first thing Kei saw. Kei's head throbbed from the effort of thinking, running through everyone this could possibly be. Then it struck him. _Rin._ He must've said his name aloud, because the other teen let out a breathless, disbelieving laugh as he moved away from where Kei could clearly see him.

"Yes. Yes! That's me, yes Kei, yes, it's Rin," Elation and profound relief were obvious in his voice. Kei subtly startled when he felt a weight on his hand. Warm. Solid. The same feeling he'd felt when he saw that flash of red in the ocean. Rin squeezed Kei's hand gently. "Welcome back."


	2. Every Time the Rain Comes Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter giving Rin's side of the storm

Rin took his time wading out of the water, exuding smug satisfaction at having beaten Kei to the island by miles. Was it petty? Sure. He took the blonde's word that he wasn't a swimmer, but his bruised pride was wallowing in the win. He looked out of the water, hands on his hips as he watched Kei rhythmically appear and disappear in the water before he tired and wandered to find a warm rock to lie on. 

His self-satisfied lizard-like lounging was interrupted by a sudden cool breeze, too cold to be comfortable in the baking sun. Rin opened his eyes, squinting upwards and frowning at the clouds he hadn't noticed rolling in. He looked out across the water, frown deepening slightly. White caps were steadily appearing on the water now, and Rin was finding it hard to keep track of where blondie was in the water. He stood up, pacing slightly on the beach. "Hurry the fuck up," he muttered under his breath, biting anxiously at his thumb.

Rin blinked, feeling something cold hit his forehead. _Surely not._ Rin held out his hand and watched water fall onto it, with a sinking feeling in his stomach. _Rain_. Rin startled at the crack of thunder, covering his ears as he crouched reflexively before straightening and looking out over the water. "Kei!" He yelled, eyes widened in horror. The water was nothing like it had been moments ago, so rough that Rin doubted his ability to swim through it. There was no way Kei could. He watched, hopefully, searching, belatedly realizing he had lost Kei behind the waves. 

" _Akiteru!_ "

Rin spotted the shock of blonde hair among the black water and took off without a second thought for his own safety. Diving in to the icy sea he swum with an unparalleled urgency. No matter how fast he was in a pool, an angry ocean was another beast entirely. Guilt fueled his movements to find Kei in the water. Rin hadn't seen him surface since he entered the water. If it wasn't for him and his goading, Kei would have never been in the water in the first place. Rin refused to let Kei die because of him. 

Breathing deeply, Rin dove under the surface once he was sure he was in the general area Kei had been. He ignored the burn of salt water in his eyes, looking and looking, trying to see anything but black. Nothing. Rin surfaced, gasping before being caught in the face by another wave. "Fuck," He bit out. "Kei!" Silence. Rin dove under again, praying for any sign of Kei, praying the kid had a good set of lungs, as his head darted back and forth. He was so frantic in his looking that he almost missed it. There, a few meters to his left, he could pick out a shock of blonde hair in the darkness. 

_Kei!_

Rin broke the surface and swum as fast as he could before diving back under. There he was, pale skin and blonde hair catching what little light there was, as he floated with the waves beneath the surface. Rin grabbed Kei by his upper arm, his hand coming most of the way around Kei's bicep, before he hauled him up, breaking the surface. Rin wrapped an arm around Kei's torso, under the blonde's arm, to keep his head above water. Rin cursed under his breath at the feeling of Kei's back against his chest. Cold. The blonde was too cold. Rin's long shot plan of waiting out the storm and treading water went out the window. Kei needed to warm up ASAP at best, a hospital at worst. Rin adjusted his grip on Kei, and began swimming towards the island. It was exhausting, the ocean seeming very intent on drowning the both of them now, but Rin continued on, stroke after stroke. "C'mon, wake up," he huffed, struggling to keep a hold of Kei. But, after what felt like an eternity, Rin's foot met with sand.

That was all he needed. Heaving Kei onto his back, he carried the taller man out of the water. He stumbled onto the sand before falling onto all fours, dropping Kei. Rin's breathing was labored and ragged, limbs feeling like dead weight. He glanced over at Kei. The man wasn't moving. Rin crawled over and rolled Kei onto his back before lowering his ear to Kei's mouth. He wasn't breathing and his skin was so cold that, with his features, Rin could have otherwise mistaken him for a doll. Rin knelt beside Kei, quickly giving him basic CPR, alternating between compression and mouth to mouth. For the longest time, Kei's body offered no response and Rin felt the tell tale pricking sensation behind his eyes. The redhead gritted his teeth, blinking back oncoming tears. "No," he hissed softly. "Fuck this, you are _not_ going to die on me," 

Rin had barely pulled away from giving him mouth to mouth for the umpteenth time when Kei's body momentarily convulsed. The blonde rolled onto his side, coughing thickly as water spilled from his blue lips. Rin's elation was palpable. But painfully brief. "Kei!"  
"..."  
"Kei?" Rin shook him, gently at first, then more urgently.   
Kei didn't respond.  
"Fuck." Kei needed a hospital and Rin had no phone and couldn't see anyone else on the island. But he knew there was a road. Rin sat Kei up with an arm behind his back and moved his other arm under Kei's knees before he stood, lifting the blonde with an ease that surprised him, before he set off to find that god forsaken road. 

Honestly, what happened next was nothing short of a miracle in Rin's eyes. He had barely reached the road when a car slammed on it's breaks, screeching to stop just past them. The driver's door flew open and a man that Rin recognised as Kei's brother from early popped out.   
"Get the fuck in!"  
Rin needed no further prompting, running to the car. He put Kei in the backseat and went to close the door when Akiteru yelled at him.  
"No you also need to get in! He needs to get warm so sit down and fucking grab the towels in the back!" Akiteru barked, eyes wild with worry.  
Rin knew not to argue and jumped in, slamming he door shut behind him. Akiteru took off like a mad man while Rin grabbed whatever he could find to keep Kei warm. He wrapped the blonde up and stole a jumper that was too big for him before he held Kei again, wrapping a blanket from he back around the both of them to get Kei as warm as possible.  
Thanks to Akiteru's insane driving, they reached the hospital in record time and Kei was rushed to the ICU.

Akiteru was given paperwork to fill out for Kei so he crashed in the waiting room, Rin awkwardly following.   
"So, um..."  
Akiteru huffed out a sigh. "I wanna be mad at you. I really fucking do, but." He pinched the bridge of his nose with a haggard groan. "It's not like you control the weather, and Kei being in the water is as much my fault as it is yours," That last part Akiteru seemed to be telling himself.   
"I'm sorry, I really am, I-"  
Akiteru held up a hand, cutting him off. "Don't. You also saved him, so I guess we'll call it square." He then extended the raised hand to Rin. "We didn't formally meet yet. I'm Tsukishima Akiteru."  
Rin took, fingers trembling ever so slightly from the cold. "Matsuoka Rin."

Rin took a seat next to Akiteru and the pair got to know each other a little more.  
Akiteru told Rin a couple of things about Kei when they came up in conversation, and Rin found it hard to believe this Akiteru, who wears his emotions on his sleeve, was related to that Kei he saw on the beach who was all salty and aloof.  
Rin in turn told Akiteru about his younger sister, Gou. Conversation went back and forth for hours, idle small talk filling the space worry would otherwise occupy.   
Eventually a doctor came out. "Good news and bad news. Good news is your brother is stable and should be out of ICU tomorrow. The bad news is he'll probably remain unconscious for a few days."

Rin looked over when Akiteru seemed to instinctively grab onto the sleeve of Rin's borrowed jumper for support. "He'll wake up though, right? He'll wake up and be okay?"  
The doctor gave Akiteru's desperate tone a small, pitying smile that had Rin glowering slightly. "He should be, but time will tell. We'll keep a close eye on him."  
They thanked the doctor, and since they weren't allowed to stay with Kei while he was in ICU, Akiteru dropped Rin home. "Nah, don't worry about the jumper." He said when Rin moved to take it off after Akiteru dropped him home. "It's Kei's. You can discuss it's return with Kei when he wakes."  
Rin could appreciate that about Akiteru. His optimism was rather contagious. "I will."  
The older male nodded and drove off.

-

Rin showed up to the hospital on a daily basis when Kei was out of ICU. He confessed to Akiteru that he still felt guilty about everything, and that he insisted on visiting until Kei had woken up and he'd gotten a chance to apologise. That was 4 days ago. The 5th day, Rin showed up without Akiteru, who was unfortunately kept away at work. Rin was sitting in the chair beside Kei's bed, the blonde's jumper folded on his lap, and he watched him, as he'd done everyday thus far, for some sign of movement. Of life. Aside from that incessant beeping from Kei's heart rate monitor. Just as Rin gazed out the hospital window, another sound entered the room, that wasn't the beeping. A soft groan. Rin's eyes widened and he nearly gave himself whiplash as he turned around to look at Kei. 

  
Kei rolled his head to the side, delicate features that had been set so peacefully for the past 4 days, breaking into a pained frown.   
Rin watched with rapt fascination and mounting relief as Kei's fingers softly curled and uncurled against the bed sheets. _He's awake_. "He's awake!" Rin scrambled off his seat to pop his head out the window, yelling for a doctor, or a nurse, or anyone really. "Please get someone, I think he's awake!" Rin returned to Kei's side as hazel eyes started blinking open.   
Kei's head turned as his gaze fixed intensely on Rin. "..... rin......"

  
Rin thought he had imagined it, his name spoken so softly from lips that had long returned to a soft pink from that nightmarish blue. Rin stumbled back a step with a disbelieving laugh. "Yes. Yes!" he yelled before forcibly curbing his excitement. "Yes," He repeated softer, returning to Kei's side and placing his hand on Kei's. "That's me, yes Kei, yes, it's Rin," Elation and profound relief were obvious in his voice. Rin gently squeezed Kei's hand. "Welcome back."


	3. Suffocate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trauma and tragedies often bring people closer. This time is no exception.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Panic attack
> 
> Sadly medical care isn't always the swiftest when you'd hope it'd be

Rin's smile faltered slightly as he watched Kei shift uncomfortably. "Are you okay?" 

  
There was a long silence as the blonde looked around. Even with the absence of his glasses, he managed to discern he was in a hospital room. Kei chewed on the tip of his thumb, trying to remember why.  
"Kei?" Rin's voice and the use of his first name snapped him out of his reprieve.  
Kei stared at his blurry figure. _He's the guy we met at the beach._ "Rin ...... Why are you here?"  
Of the possible questions Rin was expecting, that was not one of them. "Huh?"  
"And are my glasses here?" Kei mumbled as he squinted at him, trying to make out other features aside from his red hair. He'd only been able to make out his eye colour earlier because of how close he'd been.  
"Ahah. No, they're not, Aki said he'd bring them when you woke up."  
Kei did a double take. "Aki??" He parroted, baffled by the casual use of his brother's name by this man.  
"Yeah, Akiteru-"

Kei held up a hand. "Look, sorry," He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose with his other hand. He felt the beginnings of a headache coming on. "Could you just get the nurse or doctor or whoever, and get them to call my brother?"  
"Oh no worries, your doctor should be here in a few minutes. I'll go call Aki."  
Kei openly frowned. "Could you stop calling him that."  
"Hm?"  
"And why do you have his number?"  
"Kei," Rin started gently, cautiously. Kei didn't miss it, frown deepening in response. The redhead sat beside him, leaning in so Kei could see his face clearly.  
"Do you remember why you're here?"

Kei opened his mouth to reply then stopped. His frown of concern became of confusion. _Why_ am _I here?_ The blonde was drawing a complete blank.  
Rin pressed on, carefully asking, "Do you remember what happened? At the beach?"  
That gave Kei a mental sign-post and he thought back to the beach. "We... Nii-san and I were playing volleyball, like we always do," he paused, brows furrowed in concentration. "You, you were there, and we played you. Um, I remember you're a sore loser,"  
Rin smiled but it was tight and humourless as he nodded along. "Do you remember what happened next?"  
"We....." Kei pressed a hand to his forehead, screwing his eyes shut. "We, we raced? Right?"  
"That's right."  
And then-" _The storm._ Kei's eyes widened and the beeping rate on his heart monitor increased with alarming suddenness.

Rin's chair clattered as he quickly stood but Kei didn't hear it. "Kei!?" Rin grabbed his shoulders and almost flinched at how violently the poor boy was shaking. "Kei!"  
The blonde didn't hear him, one hand still pressed to his forehead, the other now covering his mouth as he hyper-ventilated. _The storm._ Rin was yelling his name but all Kei could hear was that storm. The thunder, the rain, the waves, the sound of his blood pumping in his ears as he had been drowni- Kei shoved Rin away and hung over the other side of the bed and threw up on the floor. His eyes burned from staring unseeingly at the floor and his throat pained as he dry heaved, his body attempting to throw up more food than it had had in it. 

Rin propped a knee on the bed as he grabbed Kei and pulled him into a fierce hug. "NURSE!" He turned his attention back to Kei and grabbed his face. "Kei. Kei. Kei! Look at me!"  
Kei's arms flailed in the hug, shoving Rin back. His arms flung out and clawed at Rin's arms and face, drawing blood. Rin continued, undeterred.  
"Gh! Kei!" Rin pleaded, trying again and grappling with Kei until he finally caught his wrists. "Goddammit, KEI!" He yelled, successful this time is getting his attention. Rin watched as hazel eyes flicked fearfully to look at him. Rin firmly pressed their foreheads together as he gripped the blonde's wrists, acutely aware of how violently he was still shaking. "You are safe." He said firmly and calmly. "You are _here_ and here is safe. _You_ are safe, Kei." Rin held Kei's gaze, repeating those words until he noticed the beeping of Kei's heart rate monitor go down. "That's it," He breathed, thumbs gently stroking Kei's wrists. "Come, breath with me," Rin instructed. He breathed in deeply as was relieved when Kei managed to copy him, albeit shakily. He offered Kei a smile as he watched his gaze become less distant. "That's it. That's it Kei, come back to me,"

  
It felt longer than it probably was, before Kei closed his eyes and Rin felt the tension beginning to ease out of his body.  
Rin let go of his wrists to gently cup Kei's face and listened as his heart rate returned to normal. Only then did Rin relax. "That's it Kei. Welcome back... Again." He added in attempt to lighten the mood.  
Kei looked at him before looking away, biting his lower lip harshly.  
Rin let go of his other wrist, both already showed early signs of bruising from how hard Rin had to grab him, and gathered Kei in his arms. "It's okay." He said quietly after a long moment of silence.  
Kei dropped his forehead onto Rin's chest, weakly gripped the back of his shirt, and cried.

"You're safe now."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keeping it short and sweet for you guys today
> 
> Hope you enjoyed! Thanks for reading ^_^


	4. Never Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rin and Kei's relationship really starts developing

It wasn't long before the doctor finally arrived. Rin looked over and offered a smile even as he muttered under his breath, "About fucking time." knowing only Kei would hear him. He sat back from the blonde, gently tilting his head up and using the bottom of his tear soaked shirt to wipe Kie's face. "Chin up." He whispered.

Kei nodded and watched as Rin stepped back to let the doctor take his place.

"Kei, how are you feeling?"

"Tsukishima," He said quietly. Kei still felt uncomfortable with English speakers using his first name.

The doctor nodded and corrected herself. "How are you feeling Tsukishima?"

"I'm okay," He replied in English. He looked past the doctor at Rin who was giving him a thumbs up with a raised eyebrow. Kei nodded. His English was rough but it was good enough.

Rin nodded back and offered him one last smile before he pulled out his phone, disappearing out of the door. 

-

Rin called Akiteru to let him know Kei was awake, that he was with the doctor, and that he needed to get to the hospital ASAP before he went to the bathroom. Wetting a paper towel, he wiped his scratches that had drawn blood on his arms, cheek, and eyebrow. He clicked his tongue at the mild but annoying stinging sensation. Kei had gotten him good, but he'd heal without scarring. Rin rested his hands on the counter, sighing heavily. He watched himself in the mirror, but all he could see was Kei, terrified out of his mind. Rin gritted his teeth, body shaking in anger before a frustrated yell ripped from his throat. He kicked a poor unsuspecting waste basket across the floor, watching it the wall with a loud clang. "FUCK!" His voice echoed around the empty room, too loud for his own ears. He slammed the side of his fist onto the counter, his sharp teeth worried his lower lip. "God fucking dammit." It bled, but Kei's scratches had done worse.

Rin leaned his elbows on the counter, fisting his hair. He felt like a complete and utter douchebag. He'd been so anxious for Kei to wake up, visiting him each day fueled by guilt. A guilt so persistent, so intense, he'd been looking forward to Kei waking up, _just_ so he could finally be rid of it. How shallow was that? Rin groaned, the sound agonized as he tugged his hair viciously. _Kei's awake. He's awake goddammit. Why aren't you happy?_ Rin glred at himself in the mirror. "I'm such an asshole." He hissed. Kei was awake. That was good. But he was also having severe panic attacks. Panic attacks that Rin _highly_ doubted were going to go anywhere soon. That was bad. Bad, and completely Rin's fault-

"It's not about you!" The sound of his own voice caught him by surprise, echoing off the walls.

Rin felt tears pricking at the back of his eyes. "Fuck," He breathed, pressing his hands into his face. "It's not about you." He groaned. "None of this is about you, it's about Kei. It's about that boy that you put in danger, the boy you almost let." Rin pursed his lips, taking a long moment to gather himself. "Kei's the one who's suffering." He told the man in the mirror, looking him square in the eye. "You are not.... The least you can do is help him. And _not_ out of guilt. Because you owe it to him." Nodding to himself, Rin let out a heavy sigh and muttered "Sack up," before he left, off to join Akiteru.

-

The doctor called a nurse to clean up the floor next to the bed and change his IV while she took the chair next to Kei's bed. "Tsukishima, my name is Shelby. I'm the doctor that has been overseeing you these past few days-"

"Days?" Kei asked weakly.

She nodded, placing a gentle hand on Kei's arms.

"H-How long have I been here?"

"Four days." she said solemnly.

Kei interlaced his fingers tightly in his lap, mind working over time to try and comprehend that that blank spot in his mind was four days. Four days of complete nothingness.

"Tsukishima,"

He looked over.

"You're okay." She assured him. "You've been steadily recovering.."

"Can, can you tell me what happened?"

"You were brought in by your brother and that young man." She looked down at her clipboard. "You suffered from severe oxygen deprivation but you had been given CPR and gotten to the hospital in time that there should be no lasting damage."

"Should...?"

"You went through something very dangerous. The fact you're awake now means you're going to be okay."

Kei frowned at how she stepped around the question, but said nothing.

"Now, we're just going to run a few tests before we change your treatment plan. Okay Tsukishima?"

Kei didn't return her smile, simply nodded.

She performed the basic tests, checking his visual responses and papillary dilation, his hearing, and his throat, for any inflammation. She then checked his blood pressure. "Hm, a little high," Shelby then check his breathing and his heart, pressing the cool stethoscope to Kei's skin. She nodded to herself as she put her stethoscope aside. "Everything that should be okay seems to be okay. We're going to need to run a couple of MRI scans to check your brain activity and...." Shelby paused as gently took Kei's hand. "How did this happen?" She asked as she turned his wrist, lightly applying pressure.

Kei hissed slightly. "Panic attack," He mumbled under his breath. He'd never experienced one before but he'd been there when Yamaguchi had had one back when he was bullied.

Shelby nodded and released Kei's hand. "Okay. You'll need to undergo a psychiatric evaluation." She informed him as she noted things down on her clipboard. "But," She offered Kei a warm smile. "You're on your way to a healthy recovery."

Kei merely nodded again and it was at that moment that Akiteru came barreling in.

"KEI!"

Kei lt out a winded groan as Akiteru all but launched himself at Kei, tackling his brother into a hug. "Nii-san," Kei tried weakly, only to be ignored by his brother sobbing dramatically into his shoulder.

Akiteru eventually let Kei pull away but kept his hands on his shoulders. "I thought I'd lost you," The sincerity in his voice melted away any annoyance Kei may have been feeling.

Kei placed a hand on Akiteru's arm. "You won't lose me, nii-san,"

-

Shelby let the pair share a quiet moment, as Akiteru drew Kei's dinosaur glasses pouch and handed them to him.

Kei appreciated not being blind anymore as Shelby cleared her throat to get their attention. She gave Akiteru a run down of things. "He'll need mild physical therapy and I suspect he might be suffering from post traumatic stress disorder. We'll contact you with those results and how you can help Tsukishima when he's discharged."

"Thank you,"

She checked the time. "I need to go sort the paper work for your MRI scan. The nurse should come fetch you in about.... 20 minutes?"

Kei quietly nodded.

Shelby offered him another smile before she took her leave. It was only then Kei noticed Rin was standing outside. 

"Why is he here?" Kei asked once the door was closed. "And why does he have your number?"

"Kei," Akiteru took the seat next to the bed, firmly gripping Kei's shoulder. "Rin's the reason you're alive,"

".... I don't understand," He did, he just didn't _want_ to. Just like Kei didn't want to acknowledge a lot of things, if anything, about the incident.

The older Tsukishima took a deep breath and Kei could tell this was as hard for him to think about as it was for Kei. "I didn't even make it to the beach. I was en route when I saw Rin coming down the road with you in his arms and," Akiteru looked away, shaking his head in an uneasy fit. "God Kei I thought you were," Akiteru choked, pressing a hand to his mouth as he shook his head. "I thought you were dead." He whispered. Akiteru then went quiet. The words hung heavy in the air, weighing down on the Tsukishima's. Akiteru drew a deep breath through his nose and let it out sharply as he propped his elbows on his knees, hands folded tightly in his lap as he bounced his leg. "The doctor said if we'd gotten you there any later, you _would've_ been dead." Akiteru threw a hand towards the door. "He's the reason you even made it out of the ocean. I was completely useless in helping you. And I'm so, so sorry."

Kei's heart ached at the way his brother's voice broke. "Shut up idiot," he mumbled, reaching over to hug his brother.

Akiteru hugged him tightly. "I owe Rin so much, so fucking much. He, fuck," His knuckles went white as he gripped Kei. "He's been coming everyday. Sitting and waiting with you. Talking to you. Hoping it might wake you up."

Kei looked over his brother's shoulder to where Rin stood just beyond the door.

"He just wants to help." Akiteru sat back and levelled with Kei who was still looking at the door. "Will you let him?"

Kei remembered the way Rin had held him, the way Rin had wrangled him despite being a solid 13cm shorter than Kei, the way Rin had grounded him. His fingers curled against the blanket, wrists throbbing with the dull ache of remembrance. "I suppose... I already have."

-

The rest of the day went by, Kei doing his scans and tests where he was formally diagnosed with PTSD. And severe PTSD at that. That first night was plauged with vicious nightmares and, as much as Akiteru wanted to help him, he knew he couldn't. It was an awful experience. Watching Kei cry and fight and scream like he was dying. And not being able to help him. Not knowing _how_ to help him. So Akiteru promised to visit him once a day and Rin took over night stays. Kei couldn't bare the thought of sleeping alone. Rin came in just as Akiteru was leaving for the night. He unzipped his bag and pulled out Kei's jumper. "Thought you might be more comfy in this. I washed it," he said as he handed it to Kei.

The blonde quietly smiled, but it didn't reach his eyes, the dread of having to try and sleep weighing heavy on his shoulders. He slipped on the jumper and, on him, the sleeves just reached the tips of his fingers, so he could only imagine what Rin would've looked like, swimming in the fabric. Kei watched Rin get comfortable in the chair beside him.

"Hope you don't mind," Rin dropped the bag he brought with on his lap and rummaged through it. "But I swung by your place to grab some of your things,"

Kei raised a delicately arched brow at him.

"Akiteru told me where the spare key was, so I picked up some of your books and your ipod and snacks and such. To give us something to do,"

"Oh. Um. Thank you?" Kei didn't quite know what to make of what he considered to be an overly generous gesture.

"If you can't sleep there's no sense trying to sleep. Might as well do something fun. Oh, I was going to bring playing cards but,"

Kei watched Rin pulled a Cards Against Humanity box from his bag and he couldn't help the swell of amusement he felt, his lips genuinely quirking up at the corners.

"This seemed more your style," He said with a smirk, placing it on the bedside table. "I know we can't play it properly with two people, but I still thought it'd be more fun."

"Oh, so I have a style now huh? Mr rando who's only known conscious me for like, what, a day?"

Rin chuckled, appreciating the jab. Any sign of humour was good, and what better way to do humour, than this fucking game? "Well from our brief interaction on the beach, I'd say you're about as salty as they come, salty-shima-san."

"Oh for fuck- you're worse than my friends at highschool,"

The pair sat and chatted about high school now that they were on the topic, trading the pairs they managed to make and arguing over who should win. Kei's wit was like a whip and struck with lightning mercilessness but Rin met him stroke for stroke, albeit less eloquent. As a result, Kei found himself laughing from time to time. The sound was small, but it was there. "You remind me of this guy I know- knew. Tetsurou."

"My devilishly good looks and my amazingly kind heart?"

Kei choked on what Rin thought might've been a laugh, he couldn't quite tell. "Doing _that_ pose you look exactly like him. Except for that goddamn bed hair of his."

"Oh ho?"

"He looked like a fucking rooster,"

Rin burst out laughing and Kei slapped his arm. Rin grinned but it faded when he noticed the now fully formed bruises on Kei's wrists. "Hey,"

"Hey?"

"I'm really sorry, a, about that," Rin said, nodding to Kei's arms

Kei fiddled with his hands in a way that Rin was coming to recognise as a nervous habit of his. "It's fine. Really. It. You.... -sigh- You really helped, so this?" He waved his turned his arms over. "This is fine."

Rin nodded, relaxing again. "Now, tell me more about this Tetsurou fella."

"He has stupid hair and a stupid laugh and a stupid face."

Rin snickered at the bluntness.

"He's annoying and stupid especially when he's with Koutarou and he gets under your skin, fucking STD can't get rid of him," Kei muttered as he eyed Rin trying not to burst out laughing.

"Jesus Kei, did you just call the guy an STD?? I thought he was a _friend_!"

"He is- was. He just. Ugh. I first met him how I met you, ya know. Goaded into doing something I didn't want to do." The pause weighted, both men thinking the same thing, but Kei continued on before the tension really got a chance to set roots and grow.

"He's a brilliant volleyball player. He could've gone pro if he wanted. But instead he took up chemistry. It works for him though. Tetsu looks like this iconic bad boy and party animal, but the man is one of the biggest dorks I've met. Straight A student and loves 3 things: science, volleyball, his friends. Sure he's sly and a shitty ass provoker, but he's...." Kei trailed off, looking somewhere beyond the room, looking somewhere from a time before Sydney.

"You like him/I miss him." They looked at each other, sentences overlapping. Kei's eyes were wide behind his glasses, cheeks flushed, and Rin looked like a child who shared a secret he shouldn't have.

"I- what- Tetsu? Like? No, psh what you're, you. Crazy." Kei rambled before crossing his arms and mumbling as he dropped his chin to his chest.

"Oh my god you do!" Rin practically leapt out of his seat.

"Shut up! I don't know what you're so excited about anyway." Kei grumbled as he pulled the blankets over his head. "We haven't talked since I moved,

"Doesn't matter and I'm nosy. What is it about this guy that you like? Since you've just described him as a stupid nerd,"

Kei rolled his eyes under the blanket but let it fall away as he propped himself up on his elbows. He was quiet, for a long and thoughtful moment. "His eyes. They remind you of a cat. He looks at you and he sees _you_ ," he punctuated with a poke to Rin's chest. "It's intimidating, but they're so... He's also the reason I managed to enjoy volleyball again. I've been playing most my life, but only because I'm naturally good and don't need to put in any effort. He. Tetsurou changed that. Thanks to him, I actually enjoy it. Like I owe you my life, I owe him for helping me be who I am today." Kei looked Rin in the eye. "Have you met someone, who so effortlessly changes your world."

Rin smiled slightly and nodded. "Haru. I know how you feel Kei. Trust. Tetsurou just sounds like a louder volleyball version of him."

Kei snorted.

"I'm serious." Rin chuckled, lightly shoving Kei. "And I loved him too. But I left. And he moved on. Guess we have more in common than we thought, huh?"

"Obviously. I couldn't have been saved by someone who didn't get me."

Rin smiled and the pair continued with their game and continued chatting as the hours rolled by, unnoticed.

-

"Hey, Rin," the pair were now sharing headphones, Kei letting Rin in on his music taste.

Rin opened his eyes and lifted his head from the makeshift pillow of his folded arms on the bed next to Kei. "Mm?"

"Thank you."

Rin's eyes flicked across Kei's face before he provided a soft and sincere, "If it had happened under different circumstances," He placed a hand on Kei's blanketed thigh. "I'd still save you."

Kei's heart momentarily clenched, tips of his ears going warm. "Rin-"

"It's okay. You don't need to say anything. Instead, how about you try sleeping? It's late and I'll be right here,"

Kei quietly nodded, lowering his shoulders from where tension had drawn them up to his ears. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight Kei."

The blonde took his glasses off and rolled over as Rin turned off the lights. Kei didn't know how long it took, but to his surprise, he managed to find sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow lookit that, I actually managed to end a chapter without tears XD  
> Hope guys enjoyed that lil bit of fluff and friendship ^_^
> 
> Don't forget to check out the other part of this series and again, thanks for reading!


	5. Must Have Been the Wind

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How to tell when love is really love?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YOUR GIRL IS STUDYING FOR HER OWN PSYCH EXAM WISH HER LUCK!
> 
> Excuse the time skip over Kei's hospitalisation, I just couldn't write a play by play and I felt this flowed so much better so I'm glad I kept it!a  
> This is a long boy, your comments and kudos keep me going!! Thank you for reading! 
> 
> Enjoy my lovelies!

The next few nights saw Rin spending the night by Kei's side, being there to hold him close, to ground him, to always rescue Kei when he felt like he might drown. Thanks to Rin's endless patience, his endless kindness, Kei's nightmares had become manageable. The blonde found himself sleeping till sunrise, even if he woke feeling like his heart was a bird in a rattled cage, the traces of tears on his face. 

Kei's fear had taken a tangible manifestation in his mind. That fear had taken on the appearance of Kei, except, it had been warped by his brush with Death. In the darkest corners of his mind, always present in his peripheral vision when Kei closed his eyes, this drowned version of Kei existed. His skin was pale and his face gaunt, as if all the fat and muscle had been eaten away, leaving nothing but skin and bone. He was always surrounded by a soft glow, like he was bathing in sunlight from under the ocean's surface. His eyes were black, gaping holes surrounded by hair that moved and floated as if underwater. This was Kei, if Rin hadn't saved him. This was Kei if he drowned. 

Shelby had assigned Kei to weekly sessions with a psychologist to accompany his medication, because while the boy was sleeping better, he still had trouble interacting with water. His hands shook when he had to wash them, he could only use a wet cloth to clean his face and, as it turned out, the rest of him too. The attempts to get Kei into a bath or into a shower had gone nowhere, the blonde standing there, shivering and naked. Kei knew, he _knew_ he would be completely fine. It was a harmless body of water. But no matter how long he stood there going over what he knew to be true, the sound and sight of the water kept him rooted to the spot. No matter how hard he tried, he physically could not bring himself any closer.

It was exhausting, it was embarrassing, it was one of the only things he didn't tell Rin. 

How could he? Rin was already doing more than necessary to help him, and he didn't want to make the burden any heavier. The pair were diametrically opposed, with Kei insisting Rin didn't need to keep helping him. Kei didn't want Rin's pity. But he was all too aware that he needed it. They both were. Rin was already doing enough. Kei was still proud, all things considered, and he didn't want to abuse Rin's good nature. 

Rin picked him up once he was discharged, Akiteru being at work. The boys fell into their easy rhythm of banters and small talk, Kei side stepping Rin's probing questions at every turn. He ignored the concerned and imploring looks the older boy would send his way, pointedly staring out the window. Kei's throat felt tight, hurting from holding his tongue. He'd gotten so used to pouring his feelings out to Rin when he was feeling at his lowest and Kei hated it. Rin wasn't going to be around forever, and even if he stuck around a little longer, it wasn't fair for Kei to keep leaning on him. Kei cursed his weakness, determined to get his independence back, for the sake of his sanity, and Rin's feelings. 

Kei sighed through his nose, deep and heavy. He propped his chin on his palm and gazed out the window, frowning slightly when his brain caught up the scenery that had been passively floating by. "Wait, where are we going?" This wasn't the way back to his house.

Rin smiled slightly without looking over at Kei. "Remember when you asked me how I knew how to take care of you during your panic attacks? And I told you I'd tell you later?"

Kei silently nodded his mind flashing back to the particularly bad attack he'd had early on in his hospitalisation. 

_Rin was holding Kei tightly from behind, an arm around his chest, pinning Kei's arms to his sides, with Rin's other hands covering Kei's eyes. "You're safe Kei," His voice was soft, breath warm against the back of Kei's ear. He pulled Kei gently into his chest, lightly rocking the boy. "You remember the routine right?" The routine was something Rin had taught him to help ground himself, take him away from the invasive memories that were all he could see._

_Kei nodded as Rin rested his chin on his shoulder, still holding the tense blonde._

_"Okay, good," Kei could hear the smile in his voice. "5 things you can hear?"_

_Kei fell silent, listening carefully. "Um," he swallowed thickly, his voice trembling as he spoke. "M-My heart beat, the, the cars on the street, the um, the wind.... uh.... the crickets, the buzz from the light bulbs in the hallway. Um...."_

_"One more thing,"_

_Kei worried his lips, chest feeling tight as he breathed. "Um..... your voice,"_

_Rin quietly chuckled. "Fine, I'll give you that one. Okay," Rin removed his hand from Kei's eyes and wrapped both arms around the boy. The blonde blinking as his eyes adjusted to the darkness broken by moonlight filtering in through the gaps between the curtains. "4 things you can see?"_

_Kei looked around, squinting. He was blind enough in the daylight without his glasses, let alone at night. "Um, the curtains, the wall, the clock and um.... your bag,"_

_"3 things you can feel?"_

_Kei's fingers curled into the soft bed sheets. "The bed," he flattened his palms against the bed and trailed them inwards until they bumped Rin's thighs, the skin warm and bare since the boy was only in shorts. Kei placed his hands on top of Rin's thighs, trying and failing to not indulge in the suppressed shiver he felt. "Your legs, and... your heart beat," Just like Kei could feel Rin warm against his back, he could feel the boy's pulse._

_Rin's breath tickled the junction between Kei's shoulder and neck, making Kei jump slightly. "Two things you can smell,"_

_"Uh.............. hand sanitiser?"_

_Rin snorted and Kei pinched his thigh, the faintest glimmer of a smile crossing his lips. "And?"_

_"And," Kei breathed in deeply, unaware the actions had steadied his breathing and brought his heart rate down._

_"And you can't say me again,"_

_Kei pinched his thigh again in response. "Don't flatter yourself."_

_Rin grinned and buried his face in the junction between Kei's shoulder and neck. "There's my Kei. Now c'mon Hotaru, we're almost done, one more thing you can smell?"_

_Hotaru was the nickname Rin had given Kei, and while he complained about it, it stuck, just like when Yamaguchi and Kuroo and Bokuto all called him Tsukki. He complained, and they didn't care. And eventually, neither did he._

_"Um...." Kei glanced at the bedside table. that housed Rin's back. "Strawberries." Kei couldn't smell it, but he knew it was in Rin's bag, they'd been snacking on some earlier._

_"Oi I call bull, strawberries don't have a smell," Rin's voice was muffled against the blonde's skin._

_"Do too."_

_"Do not."_

_"Do too."_

_"Do not."_

_"Do too- look it's my nose and I say I smell strawberries okay?"_

_Rin's soft chuckle, easy and light, had Kei feeling warm. "Fine fine, whatever. Now, one thing you can taste?"_

_Kei swallowed and smacked his lips once or twice. "....... Morning breath." The gross honesty was worth the extra chuckle it drew from Rin._

_"You feeling better?" He asked, pulling away from Kei and letting him go._

_Where Rin had been holding him felt colder than it should, but he nodded anyway. "Yeah."_

_Rin smiled though now that Kei could see his face, Kei could see it was weighted with a need for sleep._

_The boys rearranged their long limbs and climbed back into bed, Kei insisting Rin should at least be comfortable whenever he stayed. Kei rolled onto his side, coming face to face with Rin. "Hey Rin," he whispered._

_Rin didn't open his eyes as he hummed his response. "Mm?"_

_"How do you always know what to do?"_

_Kei watched red brows furrow thoughtfully. "Well -yawn- simply put, I was once in your place but that, is a story for another day," Rin cracked an eye open and offered Kei another sleepy smile. "Goodnight Hotaru,"_

_"Goodnight."_

"Yeah I remember, but you never ended up telling me,"

"Well now is another time. I learnt from experience, and from having a really good support network." Rin looked like he wanted to say something else, but only for a moment, his expression indicating he was done for now with the conversation. His interest now piqued, Kei drummed his fingers against the armrest, wondering what kinda people Rin was taking him to meet.

***

Rin eventually pulled up at a house Kei didn't recognise. "Don't bother with your bags, we're just here for dinner."

Kei glanced around. "We're pretty far from my place though..." His silence asked the question for him.

"There's a hotel nearby and then I'll drop you home in the morning. Is that okay with you? I cleared it with Aki,"

Kei nodded. "Yeah." was the simple response.

Rin grinned. "Good. Figured it would be better than staying in my childhood home."

Kei's eyes widened. _Childhood home?_ All of a sudden things rapidly slid into place and Rin's grin grew as he watched the penny drop. "Rin, is this your-"

"Rin! So good to see you!"

Kei took a moment to process the English, turning the source of the female voice that Rin was taking long strides towards.

"Russell, Lori!"

Kei watched Rin hug the two Australians. _So these are Rin's host parents_. Rin waved him over. 

"Russell, Lori, this is my friend Kei."

Kei introduced himself in English, quietly and politely, and Rin chuckled, lowkey thankful his English was better than Haru's. 

Kei found himself sitting around the dining table, feeling a little shy with his awkwardness being portrayed through his uncharacteristic politeness. 

"So Kei, Rin's told us that you've been having panic attacks lately,"

Kei cast a suspicious glance at Rin who held his hands up placatingly. He nodded as he turned back to the adults, mumbling a quiet, "Yeah."

"They're the ones I've been coming to for advice on how to help you."

"When Rin was younger, he had a stage where he was really depressed, despite him trying to look happy all the time," Lori smiled sadly as she placed her small hand gently on Rin's larger hand.

"I work as a counselor," Kei turned his attention to Russell. "And so we were right there when Rin was having his own panic attacks. And he's been coming to us to ask for advice to help you."

Kei looked down at the table, embarrassed. "Thank you," 

"Kei?" Golden eyes met concerned red ones. "What's wrong?"

"I just.... feel like you're helping me too much, and I don't wanna be taking advantage of you,"

"Oh Kei," Rin took Kei's hand in his. While Kei's palm and fingers were long, Rin's hands weren't much smaller. "I _want_ to help you. It's not a burden, _you're_ not a burden." Rin sighed when Kei remained stubbornly silent. "At first, it was because I felt guilty." Kei's stomach flipped unpleasantly. "But now? I want to help you because you're my friend. And you deserve support through this. I have Russell and Lori to come talk, and I have when a night's been particularly bad."

"We know we've just met you Kei, but we're here for you too. You don't have to shoulder this all by yourself."

Kei's bottom lip wobbled. "Thank you." It was another quiet whisper, but nonetheless sincere. 

"Many hands make light. I'm here to help you, and they're here to help me help you."

The sudden burning behind his eyes had him burying his face in his hands, shoulders trembling slightly. And yet the others had nothing but smiles to cast his way, Rin's hand warm on his back. He didn't deserve all this kindness. He didn't know what to _do_ with all this kindness. He felt guilty, feeling more at home here than he did at his own house. There was no denying Akiteru was a wonderful brother, but he didn't know what to do, treating Kei as if he was made glass that could shatter under the slightest pressure. His mother's room was empty more often than not, throwing herself into her work after Kei's father had left the picture and the Tsukishima's had moved. On the nights she did come home, it was always after the boys had gone to sleep, only to leave the next morning before either had risen. The one thing Kei was certain of, was that he couldn't be more grateful to Rin and his family.

***

Dinner was less emotional after that, talking about school, Kei's sporting and Rin's swimming, their goals for the future, their friendship. During dessert Kei found the courage to ask Russell for advice on how to deal with his PTSD before the pair said a light hearted goodbye and left to the hotel. Upon finding their room only had one bed, Rin sounded like he wanted to die. "What? It's not like we haven't shared a bed before," Kei asked, thoroughly confused by the outfit. 

Rin just shook his head, a smile playing on his lips. "This is just, a horrible sense of deja vu." Toeing his shoes off and flopping onto his bed he told Kei about the time Rin had stayed here with Haru and how this exact same drama happened with them having to share a bed.

Kei snickered, dodging the pillow Rin threw at him. "So is this the love hotel you take all your conquests too?" Kei's smirked and wiggling eyebrows were blocked by the pillow Rin shoved against it, attempting to suffocate the snarky blonde.

"You know Haru and I weren't like that!" Rin yelled as he flushed furiously, wrestling with Kei's long limbs.

"But you wanted to be!" Kei yelled back, trying to flip Rin off him. Curse Rin being stronger than him, he probably couldn't even pin Rin down by sitting all his weight on him. A theory he decided to try when Rin let out another indignant cry. 

"Shut uuuuuup! God you're infuriating-!!" Rin grunted as Kei threw him onto the bed and flailed when Kei sat his bony ass on Rin's chest, winding the boy. "Oh god fuck! Get off me you lank!" Rin wheezed.

"No." Kei turned his nose up, crossing his arms and folding on leg over the other.

"Why are you so childish!" Rin despaired with no real malice.

Kei started snickering but it was cut short when Rin threw him off him and almost off the bed. Well that answers that theory. 

Rin rolled off the bed before Kei could get him back. "Alright stop," he laughed. "I'm gonna take a shower," If he noticed the way Kei tensed, he didn't comment. "Get comfy, I'll be out in like 10,"

Kei got changed once Rin was in the bathroom and climbed into bed, wrapping the sheets on his side around him to get warm. He had a book open but wasn't really reading, listening to Rin singing in the shower instead. Rin, all things considered, actually had a really nice voice. Deep, smooth, calming. Kei had caught him humming along to their songs sometimes but he always refused to sing. To be fair, so did Kei. He found himself feeling a little disappointed when Rin stopped singing as he got out of the shower. 

"Hey Hotaru, have you seen my brush?"

"Hm? No, isn't it in your bag's top pock...et..." Kei trailed off once he'd rolled over to look at Rin. The room suddenly felt to small, him and Rin too close, the room too hot- Kei suddenly felt light headed, as if his brain had short circuited, thanks to the blood rapidly heading southward

Water droplets still adorned Rin's tan skin, dripping from his hair, towel slung low on his hips. Kei couldn't help the indulgent stare that raked over Rin's near naked form. Rin raised an eyebrow and the moment it clicked Rin's face exploded, face as red as his hair. His floundering in attempt to cover up had Kei blushing just as badly in response to having been caught practically drooling over him. Rin all but ran out the room as Kei almost fell out of bed in how quickly he rolled over away from Rin, burying himself in the sheets as Rin yelled a "Sorry!" 

Kei couldn't help the awkward grin that forced its way onto his face when Rin's voice broke, but embarrassment quickly returned. _That's it. I'm never coming out. I can never look him in the eye again. Goddammit Kei whyyyyyy are you like this??_ Kei's internal frustrated monologue continued for godknows how long until it stopped abruptly at the soft click of the bathroom door and the creaking of the floorboards indicating Rin's return to the room. There was another soft click and Kei felt the room go dark before he felt the bed dip next to him. 

"Hey, Kei," Rin whispered, gently shaking the blonde's shoulder. "I'm, I'm sorry about that. Please don't be awkward."

Kei popped his head out from under the blankets, stopping once everything above his nose was visible, squinting at Rin in the moonlight. 

Rin chuckled. "There's my Kei."

"Ugh, gross, romance,"

Rin snickered again and gently took Kei's glasses off his face, placing them on the bedside table before climbing under the sheets. Grinning evilly, he pressed his ice cold feet to Kei's back and _howled_ with laughter at the resounding shriek Kei let out.

"You absolute-!! What is wrong with you why would you ever-! Rin Matsuoka get off me!" 

Rin's laughs were loud and evil, thoroughly enjoying poor Kei's suffering and his curses, until a loud annoyed bang against the wall shut them up. Grinning sheepishly while Kei scowled, Rin cosied in under the covers. "Goodnight Hotaru."

Kei rolled over to face him. "Goodnight Rin."

It wasn't long before Kei fell asleep, but Rin was still awake, watching the blonde boy sleep. It was a habit he'd developed, making sure the boy was sound asleep before he went to sleep. But this time, what was keeping him up was something else. The way Kei had looked at him, Rin wasn't imagining the tension in the room. At least he hoped he wasn't. He brushed Kei's hair from his face, taking in Kei's soft and peaceful features, zeroing in on his slightly parted lips. Rin had wanted to touch Kei so badly, kiss him till they were both breathless. But he couldn't. Not yet. And so he fled the room. 

Rin let out a quiet sigh, moving closer and loosely interlocking their fingers. He was such a simp for quiet snarky boys. Kei had wormed his way into Rin's heart, occupying a space there he didn't know he had. His grip on Kei's hand tightened. Soon. Soon he would talk to Kei about his feelings. But now wasn't the time. Kei was still hurting, too vulnerable. And Rin refused to take advantage of that. Rin sighed softly, chewing his lips thoughtfully as he felt Kei's breath warm on his lips. _... Just once_. Whispering a quiet, "Don't get mad," Rin leaned in further and closed the gap between them.

Rin pressed the gentlest and briefest of kisses to Kei's lips. A silent confession lost to the night, with only the moon as his witness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lemme know what you guys thought and how you're finding the cross over! Thanks for making it this far y'all are the best! <3 <3


	6. Do You Trust Me?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kei's used to doing things by himself, used to keeping everything to himself till it bleeds out into everything else he does and someone calls him out on it. Kei isn't used to Rin Matsuoka. Someone who is so attuned to and aware of Kei that he calls him out on his bullshit before he's even aware of it himself.
> 
> All Kei wants to do is run, and for better or worse, he wasn't expecting Rin to keep pace.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HELLO MY LOVELIES
> 
> EXAMS ARE FINALLY DONE ANd now I am stressfully awaiting my psych results (>.<) (>.<) (>.<)
> 
> ANYWAY here is another chapter for you all ^_^ Thank you for supporting this story, your comments and kudos really help motivate me to keep this crossover romance going.
> 
> Enjoy!!

Rin stirred as the warm sun filtering through the gap in the curtains reached his eyes. The redhead stretched out in the double bed, arm flopping out in search of Kei, only to come in contact with a pillow. Blearily blinking, he cracked an eye open and looked around, trying to rub the sleep from his eyes. As the remnants of sleep left him, Rin became aware of 3 things. 

1) Kei wasn't in bed.

2) Rin had been tucked in with a pillow to cuddle in the place of the oh so absent Kei.

And 3) The shower could faintly be heard from beyond the bathroom door.

Smiling softly, he stretched out again, yawning in the process. His limbs felt heavy in the way that they do after a really good sleep. Sure him and Kei were used to sharing beds, but their tall forms cramped onto the tiny hospital beds didn't always make for the most comfortable sleep. Swinging his legs off the edge of the bed, feet settling onto the soft carpeted floor, Rin began puttering around their hotel room packing their things away so when Kei was done they could easily head out. 

Rin's wandering around the room slowed when he passed the bathroom door. Something didn't sound quite right. Moving quietly, as to not disturb Kei on the other side, Rin pressed his ear to the door. He almost instantly realised what was off. The sounds from the shower he had been hearing was the water hitting the shower floor in a way that indicated Kei wasn't in the shower. Rin frowned at the clock on the wall. From what he guessed, the water had been running for a while now, considering it had been going since before he woke. Rin pressed a hand to the door, on high alert with worry that something had happened to Kei, when there was a soft thud on the door, followed by a quiet scraping sound. 

Rin followed the sound till he was kneeling on the carpet, ear pressed back to the door.

"5 things you can hear..... 4 things you can see......" Kei's voice was barely audible above the running water, Rin's ear straining to hear him. 

He managed to pick up the familiar sentences from their sensory grounding routine they used whenever Kei had a panic attack. Rin felt an ache in his chest. Kei hadn't had a panic attack that required that kind of grounding in so long. He was sleeping soundly, he didn't have anymore waking nightmares, and yet.... here he was, separated from Rin by a few inches of wood that felt like miles. Rin felt conflicted. He wanted to swing that door open, hold Kei, tell him everything was going to be okay. That he was here for him. 

Yet... 

Rin couldn't shake the feeling that Kei was hiding something from him, hiding _this_ from him. 

Over the time they've spent together, which has been a _lot_ at this point, Rin would like to say he knew Kei well. He knew his mannerisms, his likes and dislikes, his first love, his first kiss, his family history. Rin knew what he was like from the moment he woke to the moment he slept and every moment in between. Rin also knew Kei at his worst in every form that took. And Rin also knew, that Kei hated feeling cornered. 

Kei is a very private person, and Rin openly acknowledged that he was privileged to know everything he did about Kei. But it was because of this knowledge of Kei, that kept Rin from pushing that door open, and instead found himself stepping away to finish packing. Whatever Kei was holding close to his chest, confronting him on something he was clearly vulnerable about would do no good for either of them. So he would wait. Until Kei found the courage or the need to trust Rin with whatever of his trauma was hurting him. Because one thing Rin had learnt from being friends with Kei, was patience. With helping him, with loving him, Rin would wait. Ready to be there for Kei whenever he was ready to accept him. So with the late morning sun warming the room and the sound of running water in the background, Rin tidied up and waited for his friend to return from the far away place his mind was in.

***

Kei peeled himself off from where he had curled up on the floor, wearily finding his feet. He shut off the water after god knows how long, the bathroom awash with thick steam. The blonde hunched over the sink, gripping the edges tightly for a few, quiet moments that seemed to stretch on. Running a hand through his damp hair, Kei grit his teeth and angrily swiped a hand across the mirror, removing the condensation from the glass allowing him to glare at the blurry figure staring back. "It's just water," he repeated roughly under his breath. "Just water, just water," 

He breathed in deeply and let out tightly, forcing his fingers to release their death grip on the porcelain sink, opting to grab a washcloth instead. Kei was angry and embarrassed. He knew it was ridiculous, he knew _he_ was being ridiculous, but he couldn't help the heavy, sickening flush of shame that swamped every fibre of his being. It was just water. 'Domesticated' water, as Rin had claimed his friend Haru referred to it as. It couldn't hurt him. And yet, Kei couldn't help but freeze at the idea of stepping into it.

_Pathetic._

He turned on the tap and, with trembling hands that had Kei bitterly laughing, he wet the washcloth and rubbed himself down. His anger and frustration bled into the action, scrubbing his skin roughly till it was red and raw. Wiping the soap suds off after cleaning the cloth, he half assedly dried himself and headed out to get dressed, partially hoping Rin would still be asleep, or at the very least wouldn't ask any questions.

If Rin did notice anything off, he didn't comment, much to Kei's tangible relief. Rin had met him with the same warm smile he did every morning, asking Kei the usual of how did he sleep, were there any weird dreams worth talking about. Unlike when Rin had come out in nothing but a towel, there was no blinding sexual tension. There was something else in its place, something tense that Kei couldn't place. What did notice though, was that Rin didn't ask about his shower. Whether or not he was reading too much into the absence of the question, Kei was grateful. Rin headed out, saying he was going to pick up breakfast while Kei finished getting dressed, their hands brushing on his way past.

Kei stared at the door long after it clicked closed behind Rin. His chest felt tight. Kei just wanted an open and honest friendship with Rin that didn't hinge on his PTSD that he felt constantly looming over him, over them. He knew Rin's intentions were good, and Kei wished he could be honest with Rin, but he just wanted to feel normal. He wanted Rin to treat him like he was normal and believe he was normal. Not this... damaged mess he'd been reduced to. It hurt more than Kei had been expecting, keeping something from Rin, but he kept reminding himself that it was for the best, for the sake of their friendship, for Rin.

***

An hour or so later they found themself driving to Kei's place, Rin behind the wheel and Kei with his arm hanging out the window, head tilted as the wind cascaded through blonde locks that were on their way to being a similar length as Rin's albeit curlier. They laughed, chatted, and teased each other as usual. The tension from that morning all but forgotten with help of an unacceptably large and loud sneeze from Rin that had Kei all but screaming out of surprise. Kei slapped Rin on the thigh, yelling at him as Rin swerved on the large empty road, raucously laughing at Kei's plight.

"Damn Hotaru! Who knew the quiet brooding blondie had a set of pipes on him!" Rin teased as Kei snapped at him again. Rin's grin turned sly, eyes narrowed suggestively as he raked his gaze up and down Kei's figure. "Wonder what other sounds you can make," he purred. 

That was how Rin found himself having to drive while a furiously blushing Kei attempted to choke him out.

***

Amazingly, the pair made it to Kei's house in one piece. Kei grabbed his bag from the car and started towards the stairs, Rin following behind him. Kei had barely climbed the first step when his hand was caught by Rin's, effectively stopping him.

"Kei," 

The blonde turned to face Rin and bristled at his expression. All the lightness and teasing and snarkiness that had been present during the ride over, had vanished. His expression was one of uncharacteristic seriousness that Kei now knew meant an uncomfortable conversation was going to follow. 

"I hope you know," he started. "That you can always be honest with me,"

Kei suddenly felt too warm, fear flooding his veins. His panic must have shown because Rin quickly pressed on, expression softening and losing some of its seriousness and concern. 

"I mean, I know you have your walls, and you like to keep people out to protect yourself, and them, but I _need_ you to know," Rin stressed, now grabbing Kei's hand between both of his. "You don't have to do that with me." Rin met Kei's eyes boldly. They were alight with determination, urgency,and care. "Let _me_ be your safe space Kei. When you're with me, you don't have to bear the weight of the world for the sake of others. Let me share that weight."

Kei stared at him, lips parted as he searched for a response but none were forthcoming.

"You are in my prayers every night Kei. I hope for nothing but the best for you." 

Kei's mind was reeling. He felt like he was suddenly swept up in a hurricane of thought, of emotions and feelings, unable to latch onto a single one.

"I want to help you find a way to be _you._ In weakness and in strength Kei. Because you, all of you Kei, is amazing and I- I never want you to hide any of that from me."

 _When had Rin gotten so close?_ They were separated by mere inches. Despite Rin being significantly shorter than Kei, Kei couldn't help but feel small compared to him. "I.... Rin..."

But Rin merely shook his head, all the intensity Kei had been engulfed by vanishing in the presence of that soft smile that made Kei's insides flutter. "I'm not asking you to change right now. But I'm asking you to try, to trust a bit more." Rin looked down, thumbs gently stroking the back of Kei's hand. "To trust me more." He met Kei's eye once more. "Change is scary, but it really is worth it."

Kei broke eye contact this time, brows knitted thoughtfully. Rin felt the hand he was holding tremble ever so slightly and watched Kei worry his lower lip between his teeth, something he always did when he was nervous. "I don't know Rin," Came the slow apprehensive response. "I..." Kei ground his teeth in frustration. He didn't know what to say. He wanted Rin to stay, he wanted to be honest with him, but he also didn't want to scare him away with the ugly parts of him that had yet to heal or were horribly scarred. But Rin's smile melted those fears and quieted that self sabotaging voice in the back of his head.

"I will always be your friend Kei. After everything we've been through, if you will have me, I will stay by your side, for better and worse. I know you tend to do things by yourself, and I know you don't like asking for help, but let me be here for you. You don't have to say anything now, or do anything now. I will wait. For whenever you are ready to talk about _anything_ or you just need company, I will be waiting right here. All you have to do is call."

Kei felt tears prick his eyes and clearly Rin noticed too, his grip tightening on Kei's hand. "Are you always this sappy?" Kei bit but it lacked any heat thanks to the shaky chuckle he let out as he rubbed his eyes under his glasses. 

Rin simply grinned, wiping away a stray tear that had managed to roll down Kei's cheek. "Hey now, I know I look like a shark but after much trial and error and teenage angst I am very in touch with my feelings."

Kei knew Rin was the cry baby of his friends, he actively teased the man about it, but honestly? Kei knew he should really learn from Rin. _"It's okay to cry."_ Rin's voice echoed in Kei's head. Rin had already seen some of the darkest parts of Kei, what were a few more. "... Do you mean it?" He mumbled after a long moment, his grip on Rin's hand tightening as if he could take some of Rin's strength to finish saying what needed to be said.

"Hm?"

"That you'll wait for me?" Kei wanted that. A safe space with Rin, and honest space with Rin, he wanted all that. But he was scared. And he felt pathetic all over again. "That you'll stay no matter how long it takes, for me to let down my walls?"

The hand that had wiped away the tear gently cupped Kei's face. "I'll wait as long as you need Kei."

Kei's chest tightened and he felt breathless for all the right reasons, tears threatening to spill again. "Thank you." He all but whispered. 

The pair stayed like that, silently watching each other, as another kind of tension, the kind from when Rin had stepped out of the shower, crackled to life between them again. The pull was magnetic, the same kind they'd experienced but ignored when they first met, drawing them physically closer, till they could feel the others' breath on their lips. Eye contact was repeatedly broken by them glancing at each others' lips and, giving into the pull, the boys leaned in. Their lips had barely brushed, the touch softer than a feather, before Kei pulled back, shattering the feeling that had all but consumed them both. 

Kei swallowed thickly, glancing away from Rin's face to stare at the ground. "I should get going," he whispered. 

Rin numbly nodded, already missing the warmth and closeness of Kei, even though he hadn't moved away very far. "Yeah," he murmured in agreement, even though neither of them moved for a long time. With much physical effort, the pair released each others' hands. "Promise me you'll call and keep in touch?" Rin asked, lifting up a pinky.

Kei raised an eyebrow, a soft snicker bubbling up at him that made a lop side, snarky smile bloom on Rin's handsome face. "A pinky promise? Really? What're you, 5?"

"Hey, don't diss the pinky promise. This is some real pinky shit." He waved the finger in front of Kei's face. "Promise?" He stressed.

Kei rolled his eyes so hard that Rin couldn't help but find himself thinking _It looks like he's getting head._ That train of thought led to a furious blush that utterly demolished Rin's composure. Kei snorted and openly laughed at him as he looped his pinky around Rin's. "Wow, who knew your face could get red enough to match your hair~?"

"Sh-Shut up!" Rin snapped as he tightly gripped Kei's finger, mind now flooded with images of a very naked Kei. "Just promise me Hotaru, goddammit!"

The leggy blonde would never admit it, but he had really come to like that nickname. He laughed, open and mocking, and despite how much he wanted to be, Rin couldn't be angry with him. "I promise I'll keep in touch."

Rin managed to get his blush under control, finally. "I'll hold you to it."

"I'll see you later Rin."

Rin watched Kei climb the stairs and disappear through the front door. "See you later Kei." Rin climbed back into his car, settling heavily into the driver's seat with a sigh. He glanced over at the passenger seat that was now empty of Kei's exciting personality, but did house the very jumper of Kei's that Akiteru had loaned him on that fateful day. Rin grabbed the jumper, planning to run it up to Kei's door, when a note fell out onto the seat. Rin flicked it open and couldn't help but smile.

_Keep it._

_Having to come get it back will give me another reason to come visit you._

_See you soon._

_\- K/Hotaru_

From seeing each other every day and effectively living together, to being an hours drive apart. It was scary, that their relationship might change. But Rin certain that they were going to be okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you again for reading! Hope you've enjoyed it, let me know your thoughts, feelings, personal headcanons, hopes and or bets on where the story will go! 
> 
> Don't forget to check out some of my other works too ^_^
> 
> Thank you for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you all for reading!


End file.
